Cultural Moments on Fatima's Birthday

This past Sunday the Shi'a Muslim community celebrated the birthday of Fatima- The Prophet Muhammed’s daughter. This day is also considered National Women's Day in Iran and I would wager from the celebration here in Ganja also for most of Azerbaijan's religious community. (Azerbaijan is also predominantly Shi'a Muslim) Fatima is considered to be the greatest women who ever lived. She is the leader of women in paradise and,the model for female piety.
After Muhammad died there was a significant conflict surrounding who should succeed him as leader of the Muslim community. His young wife's father Abu Bakr or his daughter's husband (also Muhammad's cousin) Ali. There was a conflict and Abu Bakr took the throne, which according to the Shi'a faith, went against the wishes of Muhammad. Fatima and Ali would not swear allegiance to Abu Bakr. An angry group, led by a co-conspirator of Abu Bakr, threatened to burn down Fatima and Ali's home. The mob broke down the door and Fatima was injured in the struggle and lost her unborn baby. She died not long after and was secretly burned and burried at night so that only people loyal to Ali would attend.

Disclaimer: This is definitely only one very brief version of the story. This entire issues is what divides the Muslim community into Shia's and Sunnis. And as most of you know they are still fighting with each other in many parts of the world. Its complicated so do your own research!

To commerate her birthday there was a week-long exhibit at the Ganja Historical Museum. A volunteer at the Leaders School, Elvin, helped organize the exhibit. Shahla, her children, her friend Turana, and I all decided to go and see the exhibit.
It consisted of different framed posters many with very intricate designs and beautiful Arabic script. One poster depicted the burning of Fatima’s door. And another of Fatima’s son placing flowers on her grave. There were also various decorative plates with Arabic script. I have to admit that the exhibit wasn’t quite what I expected but was interesting none the less.

Afterwards Elvin- who showed us around the exhibit and explained the posters to me in English- invited us to a concert and celebration. Then came my first cultural faux pas of the evening ( or at least the first one that I am aware of.- I’m sure I’m a walking faux pas here without meaning to be.) Elvin introduced me to his friend and I went to shake his hand – as Americans do when they meet people for the first time- but his friend did not return the handshake and gave me a strange look. Then I remembered, because I had read it somewhere- that men and women do not shake hands here. (Especially more religious people) I felt very stupid and ashamed- more because I knew the custom but forgot and managed to insult this man and make Americans look dumb.

But wait… it gets better! We arrived at the concert- which was outdoors in a park. The tables were full of women in beautiful colorful clothes- most but not all had their heads covered. Shahla told me that this was the upper religious class. We sat and listened to poetry and music revering Fatima. Then roses were passed out to all the women along with some cards with various quotes and pictures about Fatima. It was quite a beautiful event until cultural faux pas number 2 came up.
I had gotten dressed up to got to the exhibit but the concert was an added surprise and I was not prepared to attend that as well. I thought my clothes were modest enough-
my dress is below the knees when I’m standing up but has a tendency to creep when I’m sitting down. During the concert I was quite conscious of my dress- I was using Shahla’s big handbag to cover up a bit but after a while a young girl came over and whispered something to me which I didn’t quite understand but Shahla said that some people were concerned about how I was sitting. So we decided to leave and not insult anyone anymore. We told Elvin and he felt bad but I felt worse because I should know these things!! So I managed not only to insult one but a large number of the prominent members of the Muslim community here in Ganja. Terrible! What bothered me the most was that the excuse people use for me is that “She’s an American.” Well, how does that make American women look in their eyes? Disrespectful, ignorant and promiscuous?
I apologize for being a poor representative. I will try to do better in the future.
The other problem is that, this is the longest dress/skirt I have here. For everyday activities it really is no problem to have a skirt a little bit above the knees. But at religious events its not very good. Should you go to church in a mini-skirt and a tube top???

Dashkäsän

A couple of weeks ago I went to this old mining town with some of my English Teacher friends. One of whom grew up here. It was a beautiful day and I wanted mainly to share some of the pictures and the interesting points from the day.
Hiking in Azerbaijan is not like hiking in the U.S. or Europe. Appropriate clothing and footwear according to Western Standards is not required- in fact I would have felt very strange decked out in full hiking garb. Although I definitely could have used the hiking boots and anything other than jeans! Being able to afford 250 dollar leather boots is a privilege and you can hike reasonably well in regular shoes- if you don't mind slipping and sliding all over the place. It is also not necessary to wear pants- one of my friends can't because her brother won't allow it. I would even wager that a skirt would be easier to move and cooler than a pair of pants.
We also had some local boys act as our "guides." I think it was not so much that we would get lost but more that a group of women should not be out hiking alone. We hiked down to the valley instead of up since Daskäshän is located on a hilltop. We walked to an old mining cave. Which was the coolest part of the hike (in both senses of the word!). The local cows had also discovered its amiable tempartures and had used it as a 'rest area' (if you know what I mean! : )

The town used to be famous for its marble (the name Dashkäsän means cut stone). So There were brilliant purple marble stones all along the way and in the streams. The picture doesn't quite do the colors justice.

We finished our descent at a stream that had seen cleaner days but was still pretty to look at if you didn't get too close!
Finally it was time to turn around and go back. I had thought our 'guides' would find us a different way back instead of straight up the treaterous slopes we had just come down. Silly me! It was straight up back the way we came.

My first reverse hike! But reverse according to whom? I actually liked walking back up, my knees didn't hurt as much. It seemed quite strange and maybe even 'backward' at first but I could definitely see the advantages to hiking this way. You even get to see the view twice! Its a bit like life here in general...hmmm another point to ponder. Besides who needs toilet paper anyway? (more on that later :) )

Weddings in Azerbaijan

There is one topic that occupies most everyone’s mind this time of year and that is weddings. It is now wedding season in Azerbaijan which means that everyone knows at least one person, usually more, who is getting married. I thought American weddings were a big production! The whole marriage process from courtship to after the final ceremony is a huge undertaking here and a significant part of the culture which involves the ENTIRE family.
A man decides he wants to marry a particular woman and he then goes to his family and informs them of his intent. They then form a delegation and go to the prospective wife’s home to discuss the matter with her family. The negotiations may take a while and usually involve at least 4 visits by the man’s family. When they are served sweetened tea it signifies agreement on the part of the woman’s family. Then there are large engagement parties thrown by both families and finally the wedding which may be one or two years after the engagement but maybe sooner or later depending on when is best for the families.
Shahla’s husband’s cousin got married last weekend and we were all invited to the affair. This entailed a new haircut (see previous posting) a new dress, new shoes, new purse, jewelry- the works. Weddings take place in large banquet halls in restaurants or hotels not dissimilar from the United States. The groom’s father is a prominent politician in Azerbaijan and quite wealthy so the wedding was in a huge room with over 500 guests.
The focus of the evening was food. The tables were stacked with a myriad of different salads and bread and beverages- but no alcohol for the women!! Each table had its private serving boy who kept a steady supply of tasty fruit juices in our glasses. The guests arrived first and then later the couple came in together and sat up on a stage overlooking the guests. There were about 3 different T.V. station style video cameras with cameramen recording the whole event. There were televisions in the room so we could catch all the details if our backs were to the front of the room. There was also a very odd laser light dancing around the walls, either advertising or making different and often distracting designs.
The live band played great traditional Azeri dance music so dancing was a must. Azeri traditional dancing is not difficult, no complicated steps (if you’re a woman) just a little foot shuffle and some arm waving to the beat of the music and you’re a pro- pretty easy compared to swing or salsa. The couple even had hired three professional dancers to perform. It was incredible! (See Picture)
The evening pretty much revolved around eating a bit, dancing a bit, eating a bit, and dancing a bit. The couple did not circulate among the guests but the parents did. The couple spent much of the time sitting (and not smiling) on the stage and being photographed with different groups of guests. There was also very little if any at all religious aspect to the wedding. They signed a paper and that was about it from what I could understand. That may be this particular wedding so I don’t want to generalize about all Azeri weddings
It was a very interesting evening and I had a lot of fun dancing and getting to know more of Shahla’s HUGE family. They are all incredibly funny and kind. The next day we were invited to her Aunt’s house and her Mother-in-law’s sister (Aunt-in-law?) asked me if I wanted to be her daughter-in-law. I said I was too old for most men of marrying age. But then she pointed to her gray-haired son and said – how about 44?
As with the make-up- I sadly had to refuse.
Then three days later, Shahla’s Mother-in-law had to go to another party. This was a party of the women from both sides of the family who go and confirm the virginity of the bride by examining the bed sheets from the wedding night.
It is incredible to me how much the family is involved in the lives of the couple. And in general how large a role families play in everyone’s lives. It causes me to ponder…